I think we all have him/her in our past – the one that got away.
Mine…well, mine was this guy in college. Tall, smart, handsome, funny, loving – those are all very accurate ways to describe him. He was my bff for a hot minute, and early on in our friendship, we decided not to hook up, which was something we both notoriously did. Instead, we decided to give friendship a chance. Messing around right away, while I’m sure would have been fun, would have also made getting to know one another better way too awkward.
We both kinda needed a friend at that moment. Not just another random hookup, but someone who actually cared, someone to really listen to us. We found that in each other.
We grew pretty close and were very protective of one another. In fact, a few of my college friendships were ruined because of him. I know that one girl in particular was extremely jealous of me because all she got from him was a hook up, but he actually wanted to spend time with me.
Maybe it’s because I liked him whether his clothes were on or off. Well, on, because I never saw him with them off, expect perhaps in coming out of the shower with just a towel around his waist. In any case, he was a huge flirt and a bit of a man-whore, so girls treated him as nothing more. Him and I? We actually liked one another for non-sexy reasons, and I treated him like a human being, not the guy I was planning to fuck later that night. so he treated me as a human being too.
I don’t regret making the choice to be just friends with him. We only really knew one another well for about a year, and then poof – I graduated and went one direction, he graduated and went another. We lost touch somewhat, just talking randomly on occasion.
I do consider him the one that got away though, for the sheer fact that he really is everything I could want in a significant other. I mean, bedroom-wise, who knows…it might not be a good fit. But in every other area of life, we made an amazing team. Whenever I think of him, I always thing, “What if…”
I bring this up tonight because he IM’ed me at random to catch up. It has been well over two years since we’ve spoken, though we stalk one another on facebook occasionally, so it isn’t like we have no idea what is going on in the other’s life. Tonight, though, he told me that he is moving to DC, a city that I frequent at least a few times a year. For the past three years he’s been living several states away, and I haven’t seen him, but we already have plans to meet up next time I’m in town.
I’m not fooling myself. He will always be the one who got away, never the one I’ve caught. Even though it sounds like he’s going to be back in my life in a bigger way again (yay!), he is still going to live way too far away to ever consider dating. That’s ok.
But for the record, his life has turned out to be amazing. The friend I grew to love in college has finally come into his own, realizing that he deserves a high-quality girl not someone who will leave him as he’s zipping up his pants. He’s got multiple doors open to him in terms of work and school alike, and has his head on straight in all aspects of life. He’s grown up to be someone wonderful.
And I think, so have I.
About Rori
Rori is the founder of Between My Sheets. She works full time as a writer, reviewer, and online educator and can be reached at rori-at-betweenmysheets.com
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