Being a Sick Sub

I’m still working through all of the nominations for sexy bloggers, which is taking me so long in part because I’m finding dozens of new blogs that I haven’t read before. I can get lost in what you guys and gals write for hours.

I other news, yesterday, I was so sick It was really a long time coming – a combination of stress and lack of sleep. I almost don’t mind being sick though, with Daddy to take care of me. I know he felt really lousy that I was sick, but he kept reassuring me that I’d feel better and even made me stop working to go take a nap – something I rarely do, for those of you who know me.

It made me feel especially clingy, which I’m sure can get on Daddy’s nerves, but at the same time, I know he loves me and loves taking care of me. I noted to him yesterday that we’re so perfect for one another because we want the same things out of relationships. That’s not something I thought I’d find in any other person, to be honest.

I’m the type of girl who likes to snuggle, who likes pillow talk after fucking, who likes hugs and kissies. I’m not the type of girl who, in a relationship, feels like she needs to "check up" on her man. However, I LIKE calling, knowing what he is doing, saying goodnight every night on the phone if I’m not physically with him. It’s not like I don’t trust someone – I just have that mindset that I won’t be with a guy in any sense of the word unless I feel like he’s my favorite person to be with. If it is a chore to call him, an obligation…that’s not a successful relationship, at least to me.

But I don’t know…just about every guy I’ve ever dated has really hated the constant calls, the I loves yous, the hugs, etc. I’m a clingy person. I realize that. Whether I’m sick or not, it is who I am. Daddy gets that, and loves that about me. We’ve never really talked about it, but I’d venture to guess that he’s the type of guy who, if he’s out with friends without his main squeeze, he likes to get a phone call, like it reminds all of his friends that yeah, he has someone waiting for him in bed when he gets home. He’s not annoyed by it. He welcomes it. At least, that is the sense I get.

When I was sick, my feelings of needing him were amplified, but I always need him. Would I survive without him? Absolutely. I’m not the kind of person who is like "oh, if you leave my life I’ll be so depressed that I’ll kill myself." You can live without anyone. hat doesn’t mean you want to, and it doesn’t mean that your quality of life without that person would be good. I need him, at least right now in my life, to feel happy.

I guess that’s why we’ve settled into the Daddy/babygirl type of d/s relationship in the first place. I love that he’s an "authority figure" in my life, and he loves that I’m devoted, even if I do make mistakes sometimes.

Sorry for all of the rambling – I guess my whole role just become fairly apparent yesterday when I felt ill.