2 Responses to “Abstinence and Pressure”

  1. Dev says:

    I grew up in a big city in the South (of the U.S.), and I experienced a good deal of pressure to remain abstinent until marriage – I even had a vow of chastity from the ages of 14 to 19. And I agree. We need more sex positive education. Young people need to know that sex can be great if you do it when you’re ready, and that sex doesn’t have to include a penis in a vagina. Abstinence only education delays sex slightly, but then makes it more likely that condoms won’t be used and babies will be produced. Standard sex ed provides some useful info, but doesn’t tell people how to have a healthy, happy sex life; just not how to have a diseased one.
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  2. Dan says:

    Betrothal sex. That’s what conservative people in your small town might try; far more honest. It’s what Christianity Today reported over 20 years ago that Evangelical Christians were actually doing…doing it before marriage in all but 2% of cases, same as secular America. (BTW, Abstinent.org folks make up 2% of us!). How about this: if you believe sex is sacred and for marriage, have it (P in the V) with someone you intend to be with the rest of your life. Have it with someone you are honestly in love with and want to be with for the long haul. One writer friend told me she burned up three separate 6 yr. periods of her life–18 yrs.–by getting too PinV intimate too soon. I’m old fashioned. Penetration=sacramental sex=engagement with a ring and a date. And a date no more than a year off. Explained this to a 63 yr. old guy friend in a 1yr serious relationship last night. He said he liked it the idea. Betrothal sex? Try it. All else is kissin’ frogs. Also important…but doesn’t go …well, as deep. I practiced this BTW & found love, hot sex & marriage. Nice. A tough go but worth it.
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