V: I really do like you.

Me: I like you too. *pause* Is there a “but” coming?

V: No but.

Sometimes, no matter how spectacular the sex, how amazing the orgasms, how sore you are the next day, the moments you’ll remember most and hold dearest are the ones where you’re just sitting outside under the stars together and talking about life.

Even if it is stupid sentimental shit.

For the record, I started typing this post to tell you all about the mind-blowing amazing fuck I had last night, but that’s a story for another day. You should all be jealous, and that’s all you’re gettin’ right now.

Don’t forget that you can be a part of the Top Sex Bloggers List, even if you weren’t nominated or aren’t a blogger. Click here to find out how!

On the bed on all fours.

“Start counting.”

Didn’t pause…1…2…3…

Swat. Swat. Swat.

Oh, count the spanks. Ouch, damn it.

Fought the urge to cover my ass with my hands or crawl away as Daddy’s crop connected with my ass faster and faster and faster.

I got up to 20 or so before the swats came too fast to count.

“Start over.”

Today, I found out that a wonderful person at one of the places where I work passed away. She was very young with a teenage daughter. One day, she went to sleep like normal. The next thing she knew it was three days later and she was waking up in the hospital. She didn’t remember it, but she had woken up with a horrendous headache and passed out. At the ER, doctors found a tumor in her brain the size of a tennis ball. This was last fall.

Can you even imagine? Waking up one day and suddenly being on borrowed time?

She fought. She kept her spirits up. She made other people feel good despite losing her hair, eliminating almost any food with taste from her diet, and dealing with difficult cancer treatments.  I didn’t know her as well as some at the place we worked, but what I do know is that she was a good person. A damn good person.

Tell the people in your life how much they matter. Don’t take your days for granted. Enjoy every moment you have.

RIP

When you’re dating someone, not every day is perfect.

Some days will be stressful.

Some days you or your significant other will be in bad moods.

Sometimes you’ll cry over stupid stuff or make your significant other cry over stupid stuff. Sometimes you won’t know how to deal with those feelings.

Sometimes you’ll read too much into things and let your imagination go crazy. Sometimes you’ll think you’ve reached a wall, even though the road is clear and the wall is only in your own mind.

Statistically, not every day can be happy and calm and relaxing.  This weekend, there were moments that were definitely not perfect, stemming from really idiotic things that I should not have been upset about. There are still some things that confuse me and make me unsure about life in general with V, and I’m sure he feels the same way.

But at the end of the day, I do not for one moment regret my decision to be with him. When I’m with him, I feel safe. I can be with him and not say anything for hours…and that’s ok. Whether I’m hanging out here at my place or at his apartment, I feel comfortable and at home with him. I feel emotionally stable for maybe the first time ever.

So I have to ask myself…does all of this translate to love?

You know, I had about four paragraphs typed here about the complexities of love, but that’s a story I don’t want to tell today. What I will say is that I’m not ready to say “I love you” to V just yet, but I do think that we’re building something beautiful. Unlike in the past, I don’t want to say those words when I know what I feel is puppy love and happiness to be in a stable relationship. What I want is to be able to look into V’s eyes and know that I love him unconditionally, that it is a deeper feeling that puppy love, and that I don’t just love being in a happy relationship – I love being in a happy relationship with him. I want to know that I’ll love him when I’m mad, I’ll love him when he’s in a bad mood, and I’ll love him enough to give him everything and more. I don’t think it is fair to say I love you before I feel like that.

On another note, my ass was wonderfully red after Saturday night. So, even though the night didn’t end on a perfect note, there were definitely amazing moments. Rawr.  I may not be ready to say I love you just yet, but I will say that I love how V pushes my limits, takes what he wants when he wants it, and uses me. There’s nothing better than being out somewhere and to jump because he’s pinched my ass.

I’ve been considering selling ad space on the Top 100 Sex Blogger list for a few weeks now. A bunch of people weighed in with their opinions, and I’ve finally decided what I’ll be doing.

This year, anyone who chooses to purchase ad space on the list will see their money go to prizes for the amazing people who judged this year’s contest! From the group of judges who volunteered hours of their time to look through the sites you guys nominated, I’ll randomly draw two winners and distribute the ad money to them as a “thank you” for participating.

What kind of ad space can you purchase?

I’m not selling tons of sizes or text. All ads will be 50×50 buttons like the sample test one above. When you hover over the button, you can see the name of your website or any text you want (like a Happy Birthday message or other personal message). You can link to a site or you can just have the button without a link. You can make your own button, or I’ll make a simple one for you.

Ad space will be sold on donation, keeping in mind that your contribution will be seen by thousands of people (I still get 100+ hits a day on the 2008 list, which is almost a year old!). Again, the donation you make will go toward prizes for the people who worked so hard to put together the 2009 list! I recommend a donation of $10-$25, but everyone who makes any donation at all – be it $1 or $1000 with get a button on the list post in September.

You can purchase an ad to promote a retail site. You can purchase an ad to promote a blog. You can purchase an ad to tell someone that you love them. You can purchase an ad to link to your online dating profile. The sky is the limit!!!

You ad will be posted on my site as long as my site exists. Last year, a number of other blogs reposted the list, and while I can’t guarantee that any of them will repost your ads, some may choose to do so.

If you want to purchase an ad, email me at rori@betweenmysheets.com today. I’ll be selling ad space until at least September first, but the sooner you purchase yours, the higher on the page your ad will appear!